Fake Foods

Finger lickin' good.
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J. Spiffyman
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Fake Foods

Postby J. Spiffyman » Tue Jun 28, 2011 7:17 pm

My list of fake foods currently includes:

- Pork Rinds (Ham is a meat, not a potato chip!)
- Starfruit (Any fruit that was in a game like Kingdom Hearts has no business existing in reality)
- Fried Ice Cream (If ever there was an oxymoron you could hold in your hands, this is it)
- Limeade (Do I even need to explain this one?)

The above consumables are exactly as real as the moon landing and have become as nails on a blackboard at the mere mention of their name.

What are some of your fake foods?
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Ghost
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Postby Ghost » Fri Jul 01, 2011 7:55 am

I ate about half a bag of rinds the other day and I seriously thought I was going to throw up. I loved them as a kid.
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Alice
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Postby Alice » Sat Jul 02, 2011 12:47 am

They don't even have them here. I miss them.
They are all your hat.
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J. Spiffyman
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Postby J. Spiffyman » Sat Jul 02, 2011 8:48 am

They don't have them because they don't exist.
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Ghost
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Postby Ghost » Sat Jul 02, 2011 9:38 am

I can go the rest of my shitty dirty life without ever eating another bag.

And I love starfruit but I hate Kingdom Hearts.
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J. Spiffyman
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Postby J. Spiffyman » Sat Jul 02, 2011 8:57 pm

Funny story. Just went to the local Aldi today. Lo and behold! Clancy's Pork Rinds, just $1.19! And I thought, surely an ironic joke is worth a dollar-nineteen!

These things taste like dry bacon and eat like an old cheese puff. I have no idea who initially thought these were a viable snack food. I suspect beer was involved.

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